But sometimes pregnancy and motherhood are just like, meh. Don’t get me wrong, I love being a mom. This shit is hard though.
Starting with pregnancy, everyone talks about how magical it is and acts like you’re a monster if you say you’re feeling anxious, or indifferent, or even not that excited. Sorry, but it’s really hard for me to be really happy all the time when I feel like a bag of dog crap. But there were days where I had energy and I went to prenatal yoga and I felt great. It wasn’t all the time though.
People like to talk about how very easy or how very hard their pregnancy was on them. Like there can only be extremes. Which makes the average pregnant lady feel like her own feelings of “meh” or “its ok” are not normal. I’m also convinced that anyone that hasn’t been pregnant in the past year can’t remember a damn thing about actually being pregnant. Your brain destroys those terrible memories of peeing your pants at the grocery store or throwing up while driving down the freeway.
Pregnancy is an uphill battle. Sorry, but it doesn’t get better. Just different. And then you have your baby. You think “well, that’s over. Let the fun begin.” Except no one talks about how hard it is to immediately fall in love with a person you’ve never met, that screams at you and poops on you and gives nothing back for quite a while.
Again, someone (grandma, I’m lookin’ at you) who hasn’t had a newborn in 30 years will tell you it’s all rainbows and sunshine. But it’s hard. And you’re not supposed to say anything! What’s that bullshit?
Motherhood, like pregnancy, is the best and worst thing. Sometimes in the same day. The first time your sweet baby smiles at you might just be on the same day he shits on you for the first time. Every day has its highs and lows, and you don’t have to pretend otherwise.
Being a mom will make you feel like you’re on an island most days, I’m assuming the rest of your life. It’s very lonely in some respects. I mean, an island where all the people need something from you. And you’re like, wait, I thought this was a deserted island? And everyone is like nope, ha, feed us.
So find your tribe, enjoy the ride (sometimes), and pour yourself a glass of wine.